What does it take to be successful in life?

You choose how you define success.

By Geoff Folland

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As you come to university, you enter a world full of options. You have lots of discretionary time - most probably for the only time in your life. How you spend that time will be determined by what you think is important. You will choose to invest your time in those activities that you see moving you towards achieving your goals.

So, how do you define success? Dr. Ron Jenson wrote,

If you want to discover how you define success, look at where you invest your mental, emotional and physical energy. If the results of something cause your heart to beat harder, then it is important in your definition of success. I remember waiting for the results of my HSC and, a few years later, the results of my last uni exams. The tension in my neck proved I thought it was important! I also remember when I was prevented from hanging out with my friends, or playing a computer game, I felt frustrated.

But not everything that seems important proves to be over the long haul. Sometimes we can get so focussed on one thing that we fail to take into account other areas of our lives. There are times when this is appropriate – say, the day before a major assignment is due - but this is not a good way to live our whole lives.

Jim Collins, author of “Good to Great”, said of the 14 greatest CEO’s in American corporate history – those who stood out as exceptional business leaders – about half trashed their personal life in the process². He said that achieving corporate success did not mean you had to destroy your marriage and family. That was a choice these leaders made, based on how they defined success.

Jenson argues that if you succeed in your professional life yet fail in your personal life you have failed.

So, how does that relate to your life at university? You may have this idea that university is a place to acquire a degree – as a ticket to a future career. University then becomes all about your “professional success”. You want a practical degree that will provide you with the skills to succeed in your chosen profession.

But university can be so much more than that. It is filled with “young adults”. Many are experiencing personal freedom for the first time. Most are still developing personal maturity, social skills, and friendship networks. It is in this setting that you have the greatest opportunity to move towards “personal success”.

Daniel Goleman’s work on Emotional Intelligence (EQ) indicates that EQ is a better predictor of professional success than the traditional IQ³. And, unlike IQ, EQ can be developed over time. University is a great place to develop your EQ because there are plenty of opportunities to interact with people from a wide variety of backgrounds, work on projects together in various courses, clubs and societies, and to take responsibility for yourself.

A well rounded approach to university will provide you with the skills to experience well rounded success in life. Jenson lists 7 areas you should consider achieving success in: fun, fitness, family, firm (or career), finances, faith and friends.

Of these, let me just choose one - the most commonly neglected one in Aussie culture - to illustrate how you might consider success in this area.

Faith can be defined as a set of principles or beliefs. As I said, in Australia we have tended to privatise our belief systems. We have resisted engaging one another in the area of values or beliefs. But having good core principles or beliefs are essential to success in every area of life because they determine how we think, speak and act in every situation.

Socrates said that “an unexamined life is not worth living”. I would go so far as to say, in this area, it is downright dangerous. If we don’t think about, explore and evaluate our values and beliefs we are setting ourselves up to fail. So, three quick tips on how to develop your thinking in this area.

1. Read great books. There are a number of non-fiction books that have captured the best thinking throughout history. Today’s best-seller may be in tomorrow’s dump, but a few books have stood the test of time. Philosophy, spirituality, biography, history are all great places to take an adventure. My highest recommendation is to read the four books in the Bible (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John) that record the life and teachings of Jesus. They have such a huge influence on our society and culture that they must be a priority.
   
   
2. Engage with people. Don’t submit to society’s pressure to keep it private. Seek out and engage with people. I say to computer nerds about technology, “If you can’t explain it to me in everyday language, you don’t really understand it yourself”. The same applies to this area of values and beliefs. It doesn’t mean you have to agree with each other. Too often we choose the comfortable option of sticking with those who agree with us (politically, spiritually, philosophically). Take a risk and engage with someone who disagrees with you. Your belief may be challenged or threatened. But if it is easily overturned what worth is it anyway? Remember, though, always respect the person you are looking to engage with.
   
   
3. Observe the world around you. It is amazing how easy it is to go through life not looking at things. We only notice what is important to us, yet we can learn so much by asking questions about “what was the value that caused that person to do this?” or “how does this event (rainbow, natural disaster, national election) confirm or challenge my beliefs in this area?”

Remember, you choose how you define success. Well-rounded success requires developing in all areas of life. If you are interested in a simple summary of Jesus’ teaching on how to bring alive the faith (or spiritual) dimension of your life, check out: How to begin a relationship with God.

Geoff Folland has been serving as a chaplain at Macquarie University since 1995. He mentors students to become leaders and is involved in Student Life, a Christian group on campus.

1. Jenson, Ron, Make a Life, Not Just a Living 1995 Broadman & Holman, Nashville Tennessee
2. In a talk on Leadership Summit 2004 DVD produced by Willow Creek Association
3. Goleman, Daniel “Primal Leadership” 2002 Harvard Business School Press

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